No Mexico

It looks like Mexico is out. Unfortunately, it comes about 2 weeks too late, as I think they already promised the Manchester fire-breathing-robots assignment to the guy who replaced me in Kentucky. Well, hell.

As I see it, there are two factors upon which my happiness in a future assignment depends: location and function. For location, my current ideal (with Mexico and all other international locations eliminated) would be Manchester, as it has a nice balance of cheapness and not-in-the-middle-of-nowhereness. I would refuse an assignment in Towanda and I’m not staying here, which leaves Manchester, Hillsboro, and Exeter in NH, Danvers and Beverly in MA, Central Falls in RI (I don’t think they assign people here), Winchester and Versailles in KY (I doubt they would send me back here), Wellsboro, Warren (both smaller than my current town) and York in PA. Things are not looking good on location. As far as function, there are a few types of generally approved engineering assignments: Production, R&D, Equipment Design, Commercial Engineering, and Business. I’ve done production and am tired of coming back in at 11PM to talk with third shift, tired of crud under my nails, and tired ruining my work clothes. Commercial Engineering and Business both involve living in the Boston area, which I’m not up for financially, even though I would really enjoy the work. R&D and Equipment Design could be basically anywhere and involve great things or very boring things.

I guess I’m willing to take my chances.

Dilemma

So, having survived a whole year in the workforce and more than 4 months in my tiny, little town in rural PA, I’ve started to think about where my last assignment will be. From when I accepted the job, I have always been vocal about wanting to spend time abroad. Yes, I spent a semester in Mexico, but studying isn’t the same as working. Yes, I spent time working in Spain, but the vocabulary for being an au pair and being an engineer are completely different (floaties anyone?). So, I’ve been thinking about spending my last 8 month assignment at the plant in Mexico, to work on my Spanish and continue work on my current project. I’ve told both my supervisors this, as well as my actual boss at HQ, the Mexican engineers on the project, and the project leader for my current project. Everyone knows I want to go to Mexico.

Unfortunately, after saying it for so long, I’m not really certain if that’s what I want. There are several reasons for this uncertainty, the foremost being that I’m bored. I don’t want to dwell too much on this point, but I wonder if I’m bored now, will the project become any less boring in another country, or will I still be spending my days surfing the internet? Second, I’m wondering how being an expat might affect my grad school savings. I’m working hard to save money and honestly don’t even have an idea how much an apartment might cost in Mexico, or how much it could cost to get myself (and my things) back to the states afterwards. Further, if I stay in the states, I would be eligible for a second job, while I’m not quite confident enough to pull that in Mexico. Third, the adventure of new experiences is starting to wear me down; sometimes I really do need to recharge with something familiar. I could request a placement in Manchester near Simon and share an apartment with him and Eric. The comforting idea of familiarity somehow elicits thoughts of curling up with a book on a rainy day. It’s so tempting I occasionally crave it. I really don’t know what to do, or what I want to do.

Mexico – Pros	New Hampshire - Pros
Continue current project (expert!)	Equipment design (robots!)
International Experience	New (engineering) skills
Low Cost-of-Living	Can supplement income
Language proficiency	Familiarity
Possible Expat Stipend	Less moving hassle
Mexico- Cons	New Hampshire – Cons
Language Anxiety	Less useful for future career
Could end up screwed on relocation	Probably need to keep car
Project may be boring	Possible v. awkward breakup
Plant is chaotic (at best)	Not an adventure
Sexism/classism	Cold/Snowy (I am not shoveling)

I’m sure there are more on both sides, but it's basically comfort vs. career. How career driven am I?

…And Suddenly, We’re Old

It’s been a little more than a year since graduation, but it wasn’t until driving home from the airport after Simon’s graduation that I finally felt Old. Not old in the sense of arthritic and in need of 24/7 care, but Old in the sense of Adult. There are college graduates in the workforce more recently minted than myself. There are people newer to being grown up that me. It makes me feel like I should be more responsible.

I’m not sure why it took me so long to mentally promote myself from Student to Adult, but now that I have everything seems different. I feel like I should be working on more adult behaviors and eliminating childlike ones. I feel like I should know more about the way simple every day things work, like finances or gardening or keeping a clean house. I feel like I should be in control of my career and quit passively waiting until I go back to grad school. There’s so much advice out there for new graduates, and suddenly, I’m trying to drink it all in and do all the things required of adults.

Of course, after a year, haven’t I already defined what it means for me to be an adult, or do I still have time?